Truth be told, there’s no such thing as a perfect relationship. Of course, a number of them are amazing; however perfection is really a myth. At this point that does not suggest you must not focus on excellence; for continuous improvement, as you should. On the other hand, there are some romantic relationships that happen to be in a lot of problems for various reasons and you need to raise the question: is saving a relationship worth it?
You may be in this situation yourself. You’ve read lots of books about how you can make your relationship better. You’ve been to a therapist and advised to attend a retreat that provided some results. You’ve done all those things and yet you’re still asking yourself if saving the relationship is worth it, or perhaps if it is attainable at all.
Don’t be concerned if you’re asking this question, it occurs way more frequently than what you may believe. It doesn’t make you a bad person. Here’s the thing: the simple fact that you’re asking these kinds of questions is evidence that your relationship could be rescued, and that it may be worth it.
Before getting too fired up, you have to speak with your partner. This requires some planning and preparation. You have to know the reason why you feel things are on shaky grounds and why you desire to turn things around for the better. You have to be able to explain how you feel in a relaxed and logical way. It certainly won’t be easy; however it will provide you with the best possibility of success.
In case the situation is really bad, or your partner is past the point of wanting to save the relationship. You cannot blame them, you have to take accountability for your part in the relationship. If you are serious about trying to revive your relationship, you have to show your partner the reasons why. You cannot make this happen just by making promises, and you certainly can’t get it done by force; you may just do it by making real changes. Keep in mind, you may be the only one changing in this process.
After you have begun changing yourself to the person you feel you need to be, you’re ready to focus on the relationship. This will need a lot of work. You will have to treat the relationship with lots of care and respect. Try to find the problem areas and work on it to eradicate them. Neglecting the issues will not work, so be prepared to handle them directly. You may even have to go back to basics and start dating again to getting to know each other, and rediscover why you were together in the first place.
Create some positive changes, hopefully your partner will notice them. Don’t expect them to change straight away. They will need to find themselves again, and find their own answer to the question ‘is this relationship worth it’? If you both decide on yet, it will take some effort on both sides to make it work, but you may find that the very next time you ask if saving your relationship is worth it, you may reply with a big “Yes!“