Facebook says your best friend from college is engaged. “Good luck,” you think, trying to recall wedding bliss that’s now turned into loathsome snoring and dirty dishes piling up in the sink. Maybe it’s the seven-year itch or feeling the chafe of that ball and chain finally tightening its grip around you. Maybe you’ve just outgrown each other. Whatever it is, something is making you wonder, “why did I marry this person in the first place?” The minute you find yourself asking this question, you know that your marital struggles have gotten out of hand and it’s time to inject something new, different, and exciting into life with your spouse.
Making It Work
A romantic getaway would be wonderful, but who has the money for such luxury? Couples counseling would probably help, but if you don’t have the time or health insurance to meet with a mediator, that will only cause more frustration and strain on your already crumbling relationship. It might seem farfetched, but there is hope yet.
Recently, Christian minister Ed Young and his wife, Lisa, staged a “bed-in” to promote their new book, “Sexperiment: 7 days to Lasting Intimacy With Your Spouse.” Many of their suggestions to rekindle a relationship, like making a point to have sex seven days a week for one week, have received acclaim by supporters and the media. Consider having a look at their book and maybe try out a few of these other nifty tricks that might help set off fireworks with your sweetheart.
Attend a Relationship Conference as a Couple
There are plenty of couples retreats, but a conference can suggest that you are really invested in understanding how you can help this relationship to work. Your spouse might be impressed to know that you are interested in getting a PhD in Relationology. Held in various cities in Texas and Florida, this conference is sponsored by six fellowship churches. Hosted by Ed and Lisa Young, the Relationology Conference, equipped with special apps for your phone and babysitters for the weekend, will give you and your mate the tools you need to rebuild a loving, more caring relationship.
Share a Bottle of Vino
As seen on The Indian Express, a study conducted by the University of Otago in New Zealand found that 91 percent of moderate drinking couples were happier with their relationship when they shared a bottle of wine once a week as compared to couples who rarely ever drank together. This suggestion, however, doesn’t work as efficiently if one half of the couple is a heavy drinker and the other half never shared a drink at all. Remember, always in moderation.
Make Dinner Together
Trying out new recipes and making a mess isn’t a problem when you’re having fun together. Remember the lobster scene in “Annie Hall” when Woody Allen and Diane Keaton are scrambling to get the live lobsters in the boiling pot? Maybe the flour spills a little, who cares? If your honey gets a little smudge of pate on his cheek, you can gently lick it off.
Be a Kid Again
The Huffington Post suggests getting a babysitter and having date night all over again. Go to the movies or maybe just to the park and fly on the swings. You next to exercise teamwork to make a see-saw work, you need trust to be caught on the way down a slide and the monkey bars are just too much fun to pass up. Plus, exercise can help improve your outlook on life and improve the tumbling that goes on between the sheets.
Jacob Chavez Jake is a health and fitness writer living in the Sacramento area. He has written for several Spanish-language magazines and maintains a blog about sustainable living.